I became a parent 24 years ago under the misguided assumption that my children were going to do what I asked them to do with little to no resistance. Ha.

I eventually had to fall back on one of the oldest parental tricks. “Let’s try it,” I said again and again. “If it’s too much, we can stop. No worries. Let’s just try.”

It didn’t always work. Our kids were a unique and wonderful blend of anxiety and obstinacy. But sometimes it did. Sometimes, once they tried, they realized it wasn’t so hard after all, or that they even enjoyed it, or that the big bad job wasn’t really so big and bad after all.

I used the trick so often that I can’t remember now a single instance of using it. I called Elly to see if she remembered me using the trick. She didn’t, but admitted that I must have said it enough that it’s a running script in her head now. She told me that she often tells herself, “Just try.” Aw.

Funny thing was, once I started using the let’s-try-it trick with my kids, I started using it on myself. Maybe it was 5 o’clock in the morning, and I needed to go for a walk, but it was cold outside and I really didn’t want to. “Let’s just try,” I’d tell myself. So I’d try. Every now and then, my chin muscles would freeze in the wind by the time I made it halfway around the park, but most of the time I was fine once I got started. 

Holiness is a big, bad, intimidating idea. It’s old fashioned, even judgey. Holiness is only a hair’s breath away from holier than thou, after all. And yet, holiness is all over the Bible. From Genesis 2 to Revelation 22, the word “holy” shows up 551 times. Holiness adds another 24 instances. A lot of those times, in the New Testament, it’s describing the Holy Spirit, but, other times, it’s describing us. Us. I do not feel even a little bit holy on any given day, but that’s exactly what the scriptures are telling us to be.

Like it or not, we’re called to be holy. Let’s try.

The apostle Paul gives holiness a great deal of attention in his First letter to the Thessalonians. In a benediction of sorts, Paul asks the blessing of God the Father and Jesus the Son on the people–

May he strengthen your hearts so that you will be blameless and holy in the presence of our God and Father when our Lord Jesus comes with all his holy ones. (3:11-13)

That last word there, “holy ones,” is actually better translated “saints.” But if holiness makes us nervous, then being called saints calls us into a panic. Some of the translators are trying to soften the blow, but Paul just keeps batting.

The essence of Paul’s teaching on the matter was simple: You are holy; therefore, be holy. In other words, the Holy Spirit has done His part of the job; now do yours.

In the broadest sense, holiness is the product of the indwelling of the Holy Spirit in all who confess their faith in Jesus Christ. It begins in baptism and grows as we make those choices, which shape us more and more closely into the image of God, Who is Himself altogether holy.

In case they’re still unsure what holiness means, Paul tries hard to spell out the particulars in the rest of chapter 4: stay away from sexual immorality (4:3-8), treat each other with love (4:9-10), and mind your own business in society (4:11).

This whole problem of trying to understand what holiness means is the same problem Paul faced when he wrote the Thessalonians.  He knew what he meant by holiness, but he wasn’t altogether sure that it agreed with what the Thessalonians meant. 

These three issues, apparently, were of special concern in Thessalonika, as they were in most Greek cities. We know, for instance, that there existed the worst of double standards in marriage. A man could have as many sexual partners as he liked; women could lose everything if they were caught being unfaithful.  

Paul wants them to know that, even though everything that they had been taught told them that such behavior was okay, it was not. Marriage was to be held in highest honor, and sex belonged within its bounds. Wives were to be held in highest honor. To do otherwise was to conform to the world’s standards, rather than to God’s.

Holiness today has its own whole set of particulars, as our society presents its own set of challenges, its own set of temptations. 

While the particulars of holiness have changed over the centuries since Paul wrote to the Thessalonians, those three particulars still stand. Sex is still an issue; it always has been. Loving each other? In this age of divisiveness and rage? That’s still a ginormous challenge. And minding our own business, working hard, and letting God work out the future? That’s a task we will be working at until we see Jesus’ face.

These are big, bad, intimidating ideas that call for hard decisions about how we live our lives. 

So, let’s do this–let’s just try. With the power of the Holy Spirit within us, one day at a time, make marriage a gift we choose and cherish. See the image of God in each other and treat each other accordingly, even when we disagree. Do our work–whatever it is God’s calling us to accomplish–with diligence and joy for the whole world to see.

Sometimes, we’ll fail, yes. And sometimes, once we’ve tried, we’ll figure out it’s not so hard after all. We might even find joy in such holiness. It might just turn out that holiness isn’t so big and hard after all.